Well at the end of this month, it will be a year since my YWAM DTS started and it has already been more than seven months since it ended. I have been doing a lot since then and God has done a lot in me since then. Towards the end of the ATW trip, God began to put it on my heat to travel the country and visit my family to begin to restore my relationships with my family. Prior to YWAM I had made many mistakes that brought a lot of hurt to different members of my family. Worst of all, I basically did it all “in the name of the Lord.” At the time, I did not have a correct view of the Lord; so now that I had gotten a much better and accurate view of my Father, He showed me how important it is that I reconcile with my family. God’s heart is always for reconciliation. That doesn’t always look the same way and it is always up to the free will of the people involved.
So I began by staying a week in Denver, where I had just wrecked my car. It was totaled. That right there really challenged my faith right off the bat. But I knew what God had called me to do and after I finished completely freaking out, I started remembering that. That is an amazing testimony in itself of His love. So from there I rented a car and drove to Arizona where a lot of my family is now. I stayed there for about two weeks and then I flew to Montana to see Kaso. I ended up staying there for several months and I worked with her dad on the farm he worked at. While there I was able to buy a car from her brother in law. I stayed there from the beginning of September till about mid November. I had gotten off track for awhile in Montana, but I finally realized I had got to get back to this road trip.
A week or so before Thanksgiving I drove back down to Arizona to see them again for the holiday. Kaso came with me, but she flew. We were there for about two weeks. From there I drove to the International House of Prayer in Kansas City, MO because I wanted to spend two weeks there in the 24 hour prayer room. It was a much needed and really good time with the Lord. From there I drove up to Michigan to spend Christmas with Kaso and her family. I left there a couple days after Christmas and, at the Lord’s prompting, I drove to Florida instead of Massachusetts (where my aunt lives). I made it to Florida in time to surprise my grandmother on New Years Eve.
In Florida, I went and saw my other grandmother and my dad. I had had one or maybe two conversations with him in the last three years or so. Three years prior, I had told him to never speak to me again because of a number of things. I came now, because while in India, I was talking to God about a teaching we had just had, in South Africa, in which the speaker mentioned that when someone is sitting in and covered in crap, most Christians will stand outside of it and simply tell them they should not do that or to get out. Jesus doesn’t do that and nor should any Christian; very few will walk right in there with them, sit down next to them, and love them where they are at. I was telling God how I’m not like that, how I want to walk in there and sit with them and love them whether they are a murderer or witch doctor or – God said to me, “What about Todd (my dad)?” Oh. Um. Ya, I wouldn’t really do that would I… I knew then that I needed to start reconciling. So here I was in Florida, several months later, pretty scared. I went through some really tough stuff growing up and I could not wait to get away and now, not only am I back in my hometown, but I am also about to go talk with my dad who I blamed a lot of it on for a long time. I am here forgive him and ask for forgiveness and I am really nervous. God was very faithful, and even before I actually made it over to talk to my dad, He was preparing my heart the whole time. It brought me closer to Him. I went and I saw my grandmother and the next day I saw my dad. We spent the day together and did some talking; it was good. It was the start of reconciliation, which, I am glad to say is still continuing well. My time was somewhat short here as I wanted to make it up to Massachusetts to surprise my aunt for her birthday.
I left Florida and began my drive. It was a very good time of reflecting on what just happened and talking to the Lord about it all. I made it to Massachusetts in the really early morning of the day after her birthday. She was very surprised and happy to see me! I have been here since then. I sought God on what to do next and He led me to staff a YWAM base in Southern France (YWAM Bridges of Life) and so I have spent the last several months preparing for that and getting ready to go. I am actually writing this from my aunt living room and in three days, I will be flying to France!
The last several months have been an incredible journey with Jesus. Not everything was smooth sailing, but Jesus was certifiably with me through it all and He provided every step of the way. He was faithful to what He asked me to do! I love Him so much and I am so excited to start this next journey with Him!